Patricks Obahiagbon’s girlfriends phone rings
Patrick Obahiagbon : Mary, your cellular gadget has intercepted some electromagnetic waves and is currently summoning your attention
Mary: What ?
Patrick Obahiagbon:your phone is ringing
Mary : i am in the shower sweety,please answer it for me
Patrick Obahiagbon: hello….
CALLER: Ndandeko na Mary (NYANJA).
Patrick Obahiagbon: your lingual is foreign to my cochlea. Please utter alphabets in a universal manner so that I can derive sense from this dialogue
CALLER: where is Mary ?
Patrick Obahiagbon: Mary is currently interacting with a hot shower in my master bedroom that is located at the attic section of my bungalow. She cannot commence dialogue with u as her phone is not water proof like the one I own which can receive calls even while i’m submerged in my marbled Jacuzzi.
CALLER: who is this ?
Patrick Obahiagbon: do you have air-time of N100 , 000 and above? any airtime below that amount is not enough to permit me to finish explaining to u who I am via the phone as my accolades are too numerous. But to comprehend me better, visit any bookshop near you and purchase a book titled “knowing professor Obahiagbon, the individual with English PHD’s whose number exceeds the mythical lives of a cat”..i authored it when I was senator in the previous regime
CALLER: who are you to mary ?
Patrick Obahiagbon: I am the individual whom Mary surrenders to her fauna in absentia of clothing…..
CALLER: come again ?
Patrick Obahiagbon: Yes I am the individual who relays copulative sensations to Mary’s pelvic areas
CALLER: say that again i i don’t understand ?
Patrick Obahiagbon: I am the individual who exposes Mary’s lower limbs to mirror an obtuse angle . I’am Mary’s boyfriend,And who are u ?
CALLER: its Mary’s mother
Patrick Obahiagbon: good morning ma, how home
Patrick Obahiagbon: hello mama I dey greet na
Patrick Obahiagbon: mama mama mama